In the Mail

Yeehaw!  I put the visa application in the mail today!  From here it will take 6-10 business days to reach Tonga.  Once it gets there we will wire $805 to Kamu.  Then Kamu will  fill out a paper and bring it all to the immigration office.   From there we WAIT.
And we're used to that.
It took 3-4 years to even get to this point.  But we've learned a lot in the mean time.  About ourselves, about each other. About Yahweh.  Feels like we've come up with a lot of questions and not many answers.
But a few truths are becoming more solid.  (they're very basic, but difficult to master)
faith

•  faith that God is good, and His goodness might look a little different than what i consider good.
•  do I even have it?  Because most of my life i've just talked.  That's part of the reason we're going to               Tonga.  We're so weak.  Faith needs to be tested in the fire.  I don't want to live my whole life thinking i have faith and find out i never did .  I'm also scared to find out.
• faith that we'll even have $805 to send for the visa application fee!

love

• If we don't have it we are nothing.  And i mean Jesus's love.  Some days i can barely muster up the motivation to show love to my family.  How do i plan on loving and serving people i don't even know?  It has to be supernatural.  I'm not naturally sweet.
• Because Jesus commanded it.  Love the Lord your God, and love your neighbor as yourself.  Because Jesus showed the greatest love.  Any amount of love we show is just a drop compared to the ocean of Yahweh's love.

giving

• When we give we're so much like Jesus.  Giving is so essential.  And it definitely reveals a lot in our hearts.  I feel the battle a lot.  Putting the needs of others before myself does not come -once again-naturally.  Chris sometimes drives me crazy with how much he gives! 
• I want to be a giving person, i like stuff to.  And the way I see it is my love of stuff sure can get in the way of giving.  Jesus gave up His rights, His stuff, His glory.  His followers in the book of Acts didn't see their property as their own.  They sold it to give to others who needed it.  It's hard get that through my head.  

endurance

• "You want to go to Tonga because God told you?  That's so irresponsible. You have kids."  "You're not going through a mission board and going from church to church to raise support? Why would you  do that?"  "Sounds like you're having childhood fantasies."  Everybody gets criticized, i know that.  But it's still painful.  To keep saying every year, "hopefully we'll be going this spring!" It stinks to look like a fool.  To feel like everyone thinks you're a joke.  That no one takes you seriously.  We've heard it straight from people and behind our backs.  We've questioned ourselves, "are we doing the right thing?  Did God really tell us to do this?  Are we following through just so we can throw it in all the doubter's faces?"  But, this IS what God wants from us, serving others is right, and even if this process takes years longer we have to keep pursuing it.  And if at anytime God says "no", we'll stop and be frustrated, but happy we learned so much.

grace

• I'm so thankful for God's grace covering my non-missionary qualities.  I'm not a good person. Don't have a bubbly personality. Selfish to the core.  Filled with anger, resentment, bitterness, and criticism.   Oh, and i yell at my kids to.  I fear even writing this people will see my hypocrisy.  It's their, trust me. I'm extremely faulty and i'm so sorry i'm not more like Jesus.   But God is full of so much grace and he's changing me slowly. Slowly finding out grace is enough.

Visas' can be fun

nice picture of Chris in Tonga

Still working on our visas.  I feel like that has been our status for months now.  Oh wait, it has!  Tonga's visas seem more complicated than most.  (i'm guessing, i don't really know).  Here's the latest issue.
We need insurance called repatriation.  It insures Tonga that we have a way out of the country.  The insurance company (seven corners-i'm actually quite happy with their customer service, very nice folk over their) can't give us the insurance until we know our departure date, well, we won't know our departure date until we know our visas are approved.
           So it's a cruel cycle.  I all ready sent in our payment, but we now have to wait for it to be returned and then reapply for a different type of insurance.  With this insurance we can cancel before the date of departure and get a full refund,  but at least we'll have proof when we send in the visa.  Then later when we get visa approved i can take that money and once again apply for the other insurance when i know the departure date.
           Being the panicky person i be at times i was a bit concerned since the guaranteed cancellation refund insurance is about $400 more.  And if we don't do this soon all the dated proofs for the visa need to be redone (like the chest x-rays, blood work, and police records).  Thankfully a wonderful and well-bearded man is lending us the money until Chris goes back to work.  Once our visas are sent to Kamu and Saane we will then need to send $800 for the visa fee.
            No, we don't have that either.  I hesitate to ever bring up finances.  We would never want to burden or guilt anyone.  But, we wouldn't want to deny anyone the joy in giving and sharing in this privilege we have.  And boy, does it cost money. We will be setting up an account in the States that funds can be put into for the specific purpose of supporting us and our basic needs in Tonga.

I read this the other day and really like it...maybe you will to...
"Not to us, Yahweh, not to us,
but to Your name give glory
because of your faithful love, because of
Your truth."
                       Psalm 115:1

"Turn my heart to Your decrees
and not to material gain.
Turn my eyes
from looking at what is worthless;
give me life in Your ways."
                       Psalm 119:36-37

Getting Ready

These are mango trees and soon we'll be eating mangos here!  We've almost completed our visas and just need to finish up a few other requirements.  It's been alot of work but we're almost done!  Can't wait to send them out and see what happens.