life between two worlds

                                               Hi there this is Chris , Ashleys husband .

 i am not a writer and i won't pretend to be one in this post . i have never written a blog post but i feel as though i should let some stuff out .   I will call this a life between two worlds as this is how i feel .
Every time i leave the US to come to Tonga or from Tonga to the US , there is a great battle in me , that can last a few days ,to a few months . i feel as though i can't move forward in anything that is pressing on my heart . when i come to Tonga i give up my rights to a life in the US , a house ,family ,friends and so on . when i am state side i work as much as possible to try and save to head back to Tonga , to our stick house in the bush , but when i am in NH -MA i fall in love with the amazing people that are there . so i become torn .  i  am very much attracted to the good life  that the US can offer me . when its time to say good bye  again . i mostly cant wait to return to the people that i was called to . Back to Tonga . my love for our friends and family in Tonga is very strong , so strong that i can't stay away . but i know its Christ that gives me that type of love .

Every time i return my house and some important things get destroyed or blow away in the wind . So i wipe my eyes , pick up my tools and rebuild . this has created a fear in me that has held me back . i know its silly .. but i get tired of leave the place i was called to , to go to a place where i cant move forward just to be waiting to get back to the place that i will have to rebuild . .

so for the past few years we have been waiting and looking for land to build a camp . Thinking i needed the land to even try to step forward .   2 weeks ago we looked out the front of our bush house and saw we had everything we needed to start this camp . we have a massive cement slab , the second my eyes where open to this , i found so much joy .  its like the spirit opened my eyes to see . so this up coming week i will take the money we raised for the warehouse and start getting wood to build Tonga's very first skateboard park . . it will have to be a closed park . which means we cant just let the whole Island come at once or when ever they want . the land we have our house on is a gift to us that we do not want to take advantage of . so please pray that land will present it self to us so we can grow and when i say grow i mean it . this Island and its youth are starving for new things  like skateboarding  . and also will help the deportees in so many ways . the money we are raising now will help build the ramps and the paint to protect them .

We are so happy to see these thing come in to play and we are looking forward to see them unfold .
 so please keep us in your prayers . that we won't give up or give in

One hope One life One love

About that time we were away from Tonga sooo long

Tonga, here we come!  What began as a 6 month trip back home to the US has turned into over 9 months away.  I'm afraid our Tongan will be rusty and our feet will be to soft!  But also glad to miss the worst of the summer heat, humidity, and cyclones.

Our visit back has been filled with weddings, funerals, mountains, new church gathering, Costa Rica dental work, and snow!!  The mess of emotions has begun as Chris and I consider the work and living adjustments waiting for us in Tonga, the family and friends who have become so close and given so much love here in the US, and the excitement of seeing all of our friends in Tonga.  We are also super duper excited this time around because God has brought us into a great church gathering these past few months who have encouraged us and will be supporting us with prayers.  This year in Tonga we look forward to the kids starting school at ACTS after 3 years of waiting and looking for land for a skate park and community activities.  It seems the warehouse we had put a deposit on will be needed for the Pacific Games in 2019 so we will be channeling all the funds we raised for the warehouse and tools into getting land and we will be free from the burden of a monthly lease.

Samuel Hafoka

We did some hiking in the White Mountains of New Hampshire, this particular hike was amazing and the longest climb I've ever done.  Once you get up to the ridge you walk for hours in the sky completely distracted by the endless views of mountains and valleys.  The climb and the descent get me.  Short legs combined with mild exercise induced asthma brings out the whiner in me (notice i said "whiner" not "winner). Feet get blisters, legs burn at first then seem go numb on the way down, while a layer of dirt and sweat slowly builds on my skin. On the way up I question why I'm doing this, and on the way down I wish it was over already.  I promise myself every time to never do it again and then memories of blue mountain tops lure me back in.  

I guess our calling to Tonga is someways similar.  Some days we wonder why, when it feels like we're just surviving in the tall grass, plastering a wall, or doing dishes in the rain when we could be building our careers in America.  Our plastic roof was ripped open and the few things we had left in the house were stolen.  So on our return we will be staying in a tent while Chris works to fix our roof.  It will be difficult, frustrating, the convenience of indoor plumbing and ease of being unaffected by the elements will be a distant but sharp memory.  But when I ask myself why?  Why do this time after time returning with just a few bags and a lacking bank account?  One of the reasons is: you.  We do it for all of you.  All of you who have sent messages of encouragement and stories of faith renewed.  The friends who have decided to take bolder risks for Jesus because of our story.  The friends who have become disenchanted with the American dream and looking for materialism to bring happiness.  Our dear families and close friends who support us and love us deeply as we do them.  And our friends in Tonga whom God has asked us to walk beside in this adventure.  So when we are digging the stubborn thick dirt, stuffing a leaky roof with clothes, shivering in the cold shower, or fighting off fire ants coming through the floor, we are strengthened knowing these trials are producing courage, endurance, and hopefully, faith in Jesus.  Reminds me of Paul in the Bible,

       "And I want you to know, my dear brothers and sisters,[a] that everything that has happened to me here has helped to spread the Good News. 13 For everyone here, including the whole palace guard,[b] knows that I am in chains because of Christ. 14 And because of my imprisonment, most of the believers[c] here have gained confidence and boldly speak God’s message[d] without fear."

Chris and I (and definitely our kids!) are not doing everything right, we make a lot of mistakes, we at times doubt God or his existence, feel numb, give bad advice, are stubborn, struggle with anxiety, and argue.  If you're looking for imperfection you've come to the right place!  But what i love about following Jesus is He can take these imperfections and make something beautiful.  Our following Jesus has been at times painful but I am beginning to see it was purging me so what remains can be a foundation to build something better.

"We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. 4 And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.5 And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love." -The Bible- Romans 5:3

So don't give up and thanks to all of you have prayed and supported us.

Millipede

           The cool season is beginning and with it comes the millipedes.  One of the advantages of having a semi-bush house is the constant flow of critters.  The millipedes are harmless (though some say if one falls into your drink you could be poisoned and die) but annoying.  At night I start sweeping at one end of the house and when i'm finished i have big mound of curled up millipedes and more have already slithered back to where i started.  They crunch beneath my feet as i walk barefoot around the house, but are preferable to the occasional big slug that squishes between my toes.   Frustrating, but just apart of life.   Dishes are done everyday but the sink (I love having a sink! so grateful to not be squatting in the mud!) always is refilled with dirty ones.  Hours are spent doing laundry (also love having a washing machine now!) just to have the laundry basket refilled in a day or two - especially in the bush.   Love, time, patience, money, etc. are all given out just to be needed again and again and again.

            Mind numbing at times and I catch myself becoming hardened and unfeeling towards others.  New people are constantly introduced into our lives along with old friends and I struggle with wanting to be selfish and keep everything good for myself.   So grateful for the grace and mercy God gives to us everyday.  The battle is always there; to wake up and see the world as God does instead of the way I want to.  To not get hardened against endless requests and to love and forgive those who constantly are offending.  To eat what is put before me with thankfulness, knowing it may cause stomach problems later.  To spend time with people when all i want to do is chill out with a good movie.

     
 Patience is key in Tonga and although our prospects of obtaining land for One Love inc.(our non-profit geared towards helping youth and deportees)  seems unlikely,  we are looking forward the possibility of leasing a huge warehouse to accommodate the tools for the  wood and mechanic workshop, skateboarding, and Wing Chun.  The cost to lease it for a year would be about $4,800 USD which $1,300 USD would be needed before we leave to secure it for the months we will be gone.  Having a place in Tonga to keep the tools we have in storage in the US is extremely important. Without it, it is useless for us to ship over tools and then have them stolen or ruined because of the being improperly stored.  We are getting prices on the costs of shipping over a container from Boston to Tonga so we can figure out the total cost of shipping plus the duty and fees when they arrive here.  This will help us get our projects to train the youth and deportees up and running.  We would love your help, support, and prayers in this area.

           Meanwhile, we have started our first informal church meeting with our friend Nguae and his family!  Although we all don't know the same worship songs and some translating is involved it's great to sit together on mats singing and encouraging each other through Scriptures.  I'm excited to see what God does in the coming weeks!

:)

       I hope everyone enjoyed there Christmas and New Years!  The Holidays here always bring sadness to me as this our 3rd year away for Christmas.  So i thought, this year we could rent a car and our family could go to the beach for the day!  Just kind of escape and not have to deal with other people!   Ironic as it is, since we live on a small island, our kids have only gone swimming 3 times since we've been here and not once at the beach, just off the wharf in town!  

      God had other plans for our holidays. All vehicles were already rented in Tonga.  We brought in a piece of a tree, put it in a bucket and covered it with a string lights.  Two of the boys from the land we live on slept over and sat around the tree with our kid opening up presents.  We spent the day with all the kids here (there's about 14) hanging out with them and sharing ice cream cones.  That night a few more kids slept over and i sat and read them stories as they went to bed.

    New Years was similar.  We were able to buy a big box of fireworks and shoot them off with all the kids here screaming and enjoying every second.  Then of course ice cream!  We wouldn't have been able to do this without the generosity of our friends and family.  During these moments i'm reminded of how much more of a blessing it is go give than receive.  Parts of me want to use the money on something else but seeing the excitement in these kids eyes is so awesome.  They will have memories they will never forget!

    So now i would say we are settled.  Chris has been doing tons of work on the house!  Booyah!  We have a sink! New shelf windows, painted walls, mosiacs! And my life is ten times easier with a washing machine! Now if i could just get it not to rain when i want to dry the clothes on the line.

     It's also the rainy season, which i thought wouldn't come!  It was cool and dry when we first arrived and i hoped it would last forever!  Now we battle the rain on our bikes to do our shopping and keep buckets around the house to catch the drips.  I always remind myself that it is only for a time.  It's like only seeing the bugs and missing a gorgeous sunset.  I must remind myself to remember, "why are you here?" and to choose.  If it is for me...then it's stupid and not worth it.  But, if it is for the benefit of others and out of obedience to God, then it is good.  

      Chris has a few jobs coming up that will help bring in a little income and also provide a friend of ours with some work.  Chris asked one of our friends to do the work with him which is great since we can help someone else provide for their family in an honest way and Chris can spend time with him while working.

      We are still waiting to hear about the land for the camp.  But, we are not going to sit around on our butts doing nothing!  Chris has been very busy working on the house and now with some work .  We also decided to start reading Bible stories to the kids here once a week!  Although they understand maybe half of what i'm reading they listen well and we discuss it after.  We have also been very blessed by the people stopping us to encourage because they saw the documentary of us.  So crazy how God is using that!

      One of the hardest things in Tonga is finding a trust worthy person.  Every Tongan warns of this and they are right.  The weight of lies can be very burdening to the soul and it is hard not to take it personal.  But, when you do find those few people they stand out like stars on a moonless night.  That it why it is so important to us to do this One Love camp right.  We want to do it honestly, not giving our bribes in exchange for favors (expected), and not giving out false hope.  That way when we accomplishes what God wants us to do, everyone will know it was God and not us.  

 

getting ready to weave the Tongan mats

       

Transitioning between worlds is always...interesting.  After 6 months in the US things started to feel normal, although hot showers and washers and dryers never got old.   Tonight i am sitting in a guesthouse in Tonga.  We have air conditioning (awesome!) and don't need to sleep with mosquito nets.  And the bathroom is inside along with running water. Still far enough away from the normal that will be life for the next 6 and half months.  We took a ride to our house today to assess the wear and tear from 6 months of island life.  There is a lot to fix.  Some water pipes need to be replaced, we need to find a water pump, new screens, new plastic roof , and a major part of our 3 wheeler was stolen. It was a little disheartening to return to have no water and bikes.  Tomorrow the work begins and hopefully by nightfall we will have water before we spend the night.  Please pray for us as simple repairs in Tonga are extremely difficult (especially since some of Chris's tools are gone) and expensive.  On the other hand we are very happy to see everyone again.  Many people didn't think we were coming back. We were welcomed immediately at the airport because most of the people had seen the Called to Tonga documentary and were excited to see us again.  The documentary is now playing on the documentary channel here in Tonga and has been played several times!  It makes me feel a little embarrassed!
         Knowing so many of you are praying for us and standing alongside us has given us strength and courage.  We are hopeful as we enter into this and curiously anticipating what God is doing.

Boston to Tonga

As most of you already know, we have tickets to leave Boston November 20th.  We will be in San Diego for a few days visiting our friends Doug and Miranda and then flying 13 hours on Air New Zealand to New Zealand and then 3 hours to our final destination: Tonga.

 What is slightly different on this next trip is the duration and round trip ticket.  I thought i was booking a 9 month trip but somehow (not on purpose) booked only 6 and half months out.  SO this trip is much much shorter AND we know when we are leaving.  What is similar is we will be staying in the same house we built and without 6 months of our expenses covered.

As we are readily learning, there are many miracles along the way that have brought us to this point. During our months here in the U.S. God has blessed us with people who have donated in various ways. And, we have been able to meet several people who's lives have been such an encouragement to us and we feel forever connected with. One blessing was the gift of tools for One Love Inc. And i mean tons of tools!   What was crazy about the whole thing was Chris has been telling me for years about these tools and that he felt he should ask for them but never felt right about doing it. I had gotten tired hearing about it because it seemed impossible.  When we came back the person who owned them unexpectedly pulled Chris aside and told Chris that God had told him to give them to Chris!  We had never mentioned in the past couple of years that Chris had felt God wanted him to have them!  This was such an encouragement to us as it reaffirmed we should keep moving forward with One Love Inc. plans.  We now have the means of teaching carpentry, welding, and mechanics. We just will need teachers for welding and mechanics when the camp starts!  A website for One Love is being made and will be ready soon.

One of the reasons why our trip is much shorter this time is to hopefully obtain land for the camp, apply for grants, and secure a safe place for the tools since we don't want to bring them this trip without that. We will ship a container from California on our next trip out. We will also be graced with the presence of Hayley from England for the first few months.  Hayley will be a big help to us with managing applications and paperwork for grants as i spend most of my time losing my sanity with homeschooling.

Our friend Sam who came with us from Tonga will be staying in the US to train in the martial art of Wing Chun.  One of the masters of Wing Chun is in California so Sam will be going in January for 6 months of intensive training so he can teach Wing Chun at One Love Inc.  We will be opening a paypal account for anyone interested in helping sponsor Sam with the costs of schooling, food, and housing in California.

Please pray for us the next few months.  Pray we have wisdom with the camp and flexibility.  Pray we speak boldly when necessary and shut up when necessary.   Pray we can love the people around us and be the people God has called us to be.  Pray for our kids as they adjust again and that they will learn obedience to God and us.

We also want to thank everyone who's been beside us and those who haven't.  There have been so many people we've met or been reacquainted with that been such an encouragement.  Some financially, some of you with your words of hope, some with gifts.  Some people have been faithful supporters from the very beginning. God has used you all and we are so happy to serve Jesus along side of you.  We also want to say thank you to our families who are pretty awesome and help us even when they don't understand us all the time or don't want us to leave!

unloading tools for One Love Inc.